This topic is a whole can of worms that most definitely needs to be open. This is one of the main avenues where the media horrifyingly loves to misconstrued the boundaries of sexual consent. It happens too often where the phrase, “Can I buy you a drink,” turns into the person trying to have sex with you.
Did you know that Minnesota’s supreme court just ruled that if person A accepts alcoholic drinks from person B, and person A is raped later that night by person B, it’s not viewed as rape/non-consensual because person A consented to consuming alcoholic drinks, so that means they consented to anything that happens that night with person B?
Are you fucking kidding me?! So, my question to the supreme court would be, what if person A accepts alcoholic drinks from person B, then later that night person A is stabbed by person B, no charges would be pressed against person B because person A consented to anything that happens that night with person B since person A took the drinks that were given to them, right? This is the message society and the media are communicating to the world!
ANY level of intoxication is not a means for consent. Alcohol is designed to inhibit the mind, i.e. conscious logical thinking. This is why it is illegal to drive with an alcohol blood content over .08%, because we are not mentally all there after drinking alcohol. So, why the fuck is it normalized for it to be “okay” and nothing to question when people are seeking sex AFTER someone has been drinking? It is not okay. It is actually really dangerous and a violation of a person’s body to take advantage of them in a vulnerable state where they are physically unable to think clearly.
Rule of thumb, if you wouldn’t do it sober, you shouldn’t be doing it. If you would do it sober, then just wait until you and the other person are.
Think back to a time when you were under the influence and made a decision that you wish you wouldn’t have. An argument might have happened that normally wouldn’t have if you were sober. You called a person while drunk that you wouldn’t have called sober. These decision-making skills transfer over into the bedroom. This is why the consumption of alcohol does not equal consent.
Just because a person is drinking alcohol with you does not make it an invitation for sex. That assumption though, is constantly thrown in our face by the media. Music, tv shows, and movies portray alcohol and sex together, which is how it continues to be normalized.
A lot of people do not know better, which is why I am here to state that this is not okay. This instills unsafety within sexual relations. Everyone deserves to experience pleasure, but in a completely safe and consensual way. Please pass this information on if it spoke to you at all. Together, we can all bring awareness to what consent truly is.
When we see the light in ourselves, we create light in others.